Welcome to Holly's World

Help find Holly her Mr. Right!

2011-08-11T08:04:00.000-07:00

So in light of the recent activities in my life, I'm really ready to get back out there and find Mr. Right!! But, I need some help. I can't do this alone (I've been trying, it doesn't work) I haven't been out there in so long. I don't know where to start any more. I don't know where to go, who to talk to, what to wear, how to flirt, how to pass along my number, hoe to let someone know I find you interesting.... these are the things that use to come so easy to me but know they are like foreign language.

So I am asking all you blog readers out there for some much needed help, advice, direction, etc. Help find Holly her Mr. Right!! It'll be a challenge as I'm sure most of you are already saying "Gosh Holly, I just don't know any single men anymore." Well, that's not gonna work for me bc as it turns out, I don't either,and you are all I have to help, so....

I need to start dating again. I need to meet single men who are ready for a relationship, not a roll in the hay. I don't want to hang out at a bar or pick up some guy while strolling the frozen food isle, and I don't want to walk around wearing a sign that says I'm available!

So here's what I want from you: Start looking around for some great single men you can introduce me too, or vice versa. You can host a dinner party, you can set up a double date, you can do all sorts of things! Ok, sure, maybe you don't know any single men yourself, but what about your husband? Does he know of any from his job, the gym, or your Church? If that doesn't work, maybe you have some suggestions as to where I could make some new connections -beyond that standards like Church (I'm already trying this one & it's not going so well yet).

My boss even mentioned that maybe I should join a Wine Tasting Class or something -which is not a bad idea but that requires I have a stand-by sitter for Sophie -which I don't have either - will work on this!

Ok, so there's the challenge. Let me hear what you got! I'll try to blog about it as we walk through this journey together....

My adventures in dating... Part 6

2011-08-11T06:31:00.000-07:00

So last night was pretty awful. I'm I've only know Mr. D for a little over a month but we talk every day and some of our conversations are pretty cozy -Like, he will tell me how great it would be if he could be here to hold me in his arms and fall asleep together -- Who says these things? I've warned/asked him in the past not to say such things until he knew for sure what he wanted, and so I suppose by him saying them still, I took it that he knew what he wanted... Me. Guess that was wrong!!

So I get the text messages yesterday at work. I can't remember if he calls me or if I call him but either way, we talk for a short while about what happened the night before. Somewhere in all this, he get's hung up on me offering him a way out early into this "relationship" and how easy it was/is for me to walk away -- HOLD THE PHONE BUDDY -- I try to explain how it was more of a coping mechanism on my part then anything else and that I do have feelings that have started to grow for him (definitely not the LOVE feelings -waaaay too soon for that!). I tell him I don't feel comfortable trying to "convince" him to choose me, that I feel he should already "want" to choose me, especially given the situation and our past conversations but that it is ultimately up to him.... blah, blah, blah. We hang up and my stomach immediately starts to hurt and I head home around 3:30.

I'm a thinker -- all I do is think about a situation. I will replay every word, every action, every emotion -- It's awful and I can't stop myself from doing this!! I even go as far as turning the radio up as loud as I can just so I can't hear myself think, sadly this too does not work. I wonder if this is why I took to drugs and alcohol so easily in my younger years. I do not do well with "feelings".

So I get home and decided to call him again. Not that I want to talk about this current issue, I just want to talk, to hear his voice I so enjoy listening too. It's almost like getting a tattoo -you know it hurts, yet you do it anyway! So we chat, and it's nice, its comforting (to me at least) and then he gets a phone call coming in, said it was work and that he needed to call them back. I say "Ok, call me when you are done" and he has this tone like, please don't let me go so quickly, so I say "I only said that bc you said you had to call work" to which he says "I know I do, its work." So I again say "So, call me when you're done and we'll chat for a little while longer", to which his reply is something like "Ok, I will (but with gusto in his voice)."

A little time goes by and he's not calling me back. In my now slightly inebriated state I decide to send him some play full text messages -- like a picture of me with the caption "R u gonna call?", a picture of the dress I had all picked out for our date night, a picture of the 1/2 gone bottle of wine I had saved for our date night, blah, blah, blah.... Either way, it didn't work!

By this point I am feeling completely defeated -well, maybe not defeated, more like Not Chosen, second best, over looked, not good enough, blah, blah, blah. All of which are pretty awful to feel like. So I talk with Mom, I talk with Julie, I even talk to a few friends throughout the night and I still fall into this utter self depression. I haven't visited this place in such a long time -six years at least!

But at around 8:30 pm, I find I have a text from Mr. D. I missed when it came in as I was wallowing in self pity and didn't notice the chime of the phone.... He says "Sorry by the time I got off the phone I was almost here. Talk to you soon." What?!?! What in the world does this mean? Does this mean what I hope it does, that he has decided to leave this other girl and focus only on me??

NOOOOOOOOOO! It doesn't. Why do I say this with such emphasis? Because he hasn't texted and/or called since.... It's now 8:30am!! I've sent him a couple of texts last night and once this morning -all light hearted and easy going -all with the same message of "Please call me". We will see what happens.

Plenty of things could have happened last night. Here are a few of my favorites: 1) He could have made up with her and stayed the night with her (my personal opinion). 2) He could have broken up with her and stayed at a hotel and was just too tired to call from the long drive and/or fight he had had and fell right to sleep. 3) He could have broken up with her and driven back to his house and was just too tired to call from the long drive and/or fight he had had and fell right to sleep.

He told me once that he does better in a relationship then out of one, so with this in mind, I believe the first option is what took place. I believe it took place because I'm too new and that scares him too much. I believe he chose to stay where he felt comfortable but not completely happy. I am still the unknown to him and that poses a possible threat -would this work with Holly, would she be this way even after 6 mo, a year, would we still get along after a fight, would she.... Sometimes the "would she's" are just too much for some. I'll keep you posted if something changes but I have a feeling that that was the last of Mr. D.

SIDE NOTE: I've lost a total of 12 pounds since my vacation in July!!!

My adventures in dating... Part 5

2011-08-10T12:22:00.000-07:00

Well that was short lived! Apparently it wasn't as special as I thought it was. Man, that kinna sucks. I'm thankful for the time tho; It brought me back from, well, where ever I was, dying alone.

I got the "I'm just confused" line and also the "I know what I want, I'm just having a hard time" bit.... What?!?! What does that even mean?!?! I can tell you this much -Mr. D -is not so "D" anymore! I knew he was talking to another girl, but he also explained that it was not serious. I also know that he and I talked 120% more often then he did with this other girl, so it's really my fault, for assuming, that that meant he was leaning this direction! Ug.

I feel like crap after all this this afternoon -- we had big plans for this weekend to hang out and have dinner, possibly a movie -but not now. Now he's headed straight home, "I need more time." I'm tired of waiting just as well -I was ready to move forward with putting a label on "us" and not worried about who knew, or who didn't. So I suppose this is good....

Now to get back out there and find Mr. R (Mr. Right!). Please, Lord, help me here!

Yours Truly and Utterly Defeated,
Holly F.

YES, I HAVE...

2011-08-08T10:00:00.000-07:00

Yes, I Have...

The instructions with this are to bold the ones you’ve done, leave the others in normal type. So here goes.

1. Started your own blog (um, yes…)
2. Slept under the stars
3. Played in a band
4. Visited Hawaii
5. Watched a meteor shower (though I never see them!!!)
6. Given more than you can afford to charity
7. Been to Disneyland/world
8. Climbed a mountain.
9. Held a praying mantis
10. Sang a solo
11. Bungee jumped
12. Visited Paris
13. Watched a lightning storm at sea
14. Taught yourself an art from scratch
15. Adopted a child
16. Had food poisoning
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty
18. Grown your own vegetables
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France
20. Slept on an overnight train
21. Had a pillow fight
22. Hitch hiked
23. Taken a sick day when you're not ill (teehee!)
24. Built a snow fort
25. Held a lamb
26. Gone skinny dipping
27. Run a Marathon
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice
29 Seen a total eclipse
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset
31. Hit a home run
32. Been on a cruise
33 Seen Niagara Falls in person
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors
35. Seen an Amish community
36. Taught yourself a new language
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
39. Gone rock climbing
40. Seen Michelangelo's David
41 Sung karaoke
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt
43. Bought a stranger a meal in a restaurant
44. Visited Africa
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight (one of my favorite things ever!)
46. Been transported in an ambulance
47. Had your portrait painted
48. Gone deep sea fishing
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling
52. Kissed in the rain
53. Played in the mud
54. Gone to a drive-in theater
55. Been in a movie
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
57. Started a business
58. Taken a martial arts class
59. Visited Russia
60. Served at a soup kitchen
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies
62. Gone whale watching
63. Gotten flowers for no reason
64. Donated blood, platelets, or plasma
65. Gone sky diving
66 Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp
67. Bounced a check
68. Flown in a helicopter
69. Saved a favorite childhood toy
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial
71. Eaten Caviar
72. Pieced a quilt
73. Stood in Times Square
74. Toured the Everglades
75. Been fired from a job
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London
77. Broken a bone
78. Been on a speeding motorcycle
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person
80. Published a book
81. Visited the Vatican
82. Bought a brand new car
83. Walked in Jerusalem
84. Had your picture in the newspaper
85. Read the entire Bible
86. Visited the White House
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
88. Had chickenpox
89. Saved someone’s life (I have a kid under 5, every day I do this!!)
90. Sat on a jury
91. Met someone famous
92. Joined a book club
93. Lost a loved one
94. Had a baby
95. Seen the Alamo in person
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake
97. Been involved in a lawsuit
98. Owned a cell phone
99. Been stung by a bee
Your turn!

My adventures in dating... Part 4

2011-08-08T08:16:00.000-07:00

So things have been going great! Mr. D and I decided (tho I thought it was already decided) that we would take things slow and wait to see how thing progress on their own, naturally. This is good news for me -but I think I'm past just wanting to be friends!

Anyway, Mr. D had last Friday night off (his kids were suppose to come for a visit but didn't) so he had the day free to do nothing -- He ended up going fishing and grilling out. Since he's been working 12 hr shifts for the last couple of weeks with no days off, this was such a wonderful afternoon for him! So that evening he calls me at around 11pm and we chat the entire night! Around 5:30am his battery went dead and he had to move back to the bedroom area where the charger was (no signal back there) so we kept the conversation going until roughly 10 am by text! We talked about everything, mostly about nothing special. It was sooo nice.

Towards the 5:30 am mark he says to me "I think we need to talk." O'crap what now I think. This is when the bad news happens, right? Man, and I really liked him too! So I say "ok, what about." He goes on to tell me "I really like you" and I say, "Yea, me too" He says "no, I really like you" Wow! sent me over the moon! So we go on to chat a little more about this and he says to me "I don't want to hurt anyone or make another wrong decision." We go on and talk a little more about this and really what it comes down to is this....

Mr. D and I have met for all of 8 hours (if that) -all rolled into one weekend . That doesn't offer a lot of time to see how compatible we actually are together. O' sure, we talk all the time, we know we agree on the big issues, and even most of the small issues. We know we definitely have chemistry but do we get along regarding the normal every day things like -dating? How does he react to someone cutting him off in traffic or having to wait for a table -- normal things! It's almost like Internet Dating, he and I and just because you are great via phone -doesn't mean you will be in person, right?!?!

But there is good news... His job is ending this week so with this in mind I say "since your job is ending sooner then originally thought, why not come for a visit, maybe stay a day or two (at a hotel!) and we'll see how things go." To which he AGREES! He should be here towards the end of the week. I'm so excited!

An actual date, like with dinner, possibly a movie -it's too hot to hang out at the park and he doesn't drink coffee! What kind of person doesn't drink coffee!?!?! If you have any other "out of the house" suggestions for a date, please leave a message!!

Till next time.

My adventures in dating... Part 3

2011-08-04T08:50:00.000-07:00

Well, it must not have been as bad as I thought. He texted last night around 5pm and we've been texting ever since -- feeling back to normal. I had a few plans for the night as well, so I'm sure that helped me keep my mind not so focused on Mr. D. and I'm trying to keep busy/ier with Sophie being gone as well. In fact this weekend, I'm thinking of getting another tattoo -just a small one on my finger and I've started doing a few exercises. I figure if I'm gonna find a man, whether it's Mr. D or not, I wanna look good doing it!!!

Back to Mr. D - I was happy to get his text last night. Yesterday was so awful for me. I was happy to know I didn't scare him off so easily, happy to know he really does like me, and happy to know that maybe there is something here after all.

We chatted most of the night (I am so tired today!) and for a short while this morning. He's sleeping now and has quiet a bit going on this afternoon, but we communicated about it and so hopefully my mind won't be running rampage over me.

On another note - I got a new phone!! A Blackberry Torch. Texting was getting so hard with my Samsung. Before, I would lose connection, have to move toward a window, or worse, sit outside to chat by text or even to place a phone call. And let me just say, sitting outside at midnight texting is no fun! Thanks goodness for my dogs to keep me company out there! The Torch has been a blessing so far... I love everything about!

More updates to come.... I promise I won't leave you hangin on this one... Bye for now.

My adventures in dating... Part 2

2011-08-03T10:08:00.000-07:00

Well here it is three days since and I've screwed everything up! Why do girls do this, I do not know!! I've explained to Mr. D. before that this was new to me, that it had been a while since my last dating experience, that I needed to take things slow, that I've not had a "grown-up" relationship before... but how can you stop your brain from telling you lies and feeding off your insecurities!?!?! You can't, that's what I've decided. I've tried -it doesn't work well for me. I'm told this is normal and that every girl goes through this -some better than others. I clearly fall short here.

See, before we met -he was quick to respond to my texts or phone calls. He was quick to make me laugh or to send me a simple "HI" but now, now that we've met -things aren't so quick. We chatted Sunday on my drive home until I made it to the main highway and we've chatted every night since -but it's been very different, you can feel a distance -- Why? What happened? Was it me? Was I not what he thought I'd be? Is he regretting talking with me, with meeting me? Stupid questions that won't stop!! Might I add that it doesn't help that Sophie is not at home for a much needed distraction or hug!

Anyway, last night I went on a bit of a rant. Not too bad, but bad enough to cause damage in a newly beginning relationship. I tried to explain (by text mind you) that I felt like every time I wanted to talk (by phone), he was busy but rather then tell me he was busy, he just wouldn't answer my texts until a while later -and then still not call, only text. It came across to me as a bit stand offish, like maybe he really was changing his mind about me -which lead to even more insecure feelings, topped with missing Sophie -- never a good combination!

He didn't communicate that he had gotten something in his eye the other day and needed to see an eye doctor or that he hasn't been able to catch up on his sleep since the weekend, or that work has been crazy busy for him... I didn't know these things bc Mr. D didn't communicate that with me, until after my rant. I get that he is really tired and probably doing his best with what he has right now but either way, the texts were sent and I screwed up something that could have been... What must he think of me now? I know if I were him, I'd be thinking "what in the world have I gotten myself into?"

Oh sure he responded back to my rant with "Jeez you think too much and must not remember anything either" (he's referring to him coming for a visit after the job ends also referring to the fact that he does (or did) really like me too). Also to follow was "We should wait to see how things develop, to see where they go naturally" -- which I totally get and completely agree with. BUT why did I have to send those texts!!! I keep going over them. They were reasonable, and very childish! I 100% feel like I'm back in high school. Had he just communicated with me a little better maybe I wouldn't have slipped over to the dark side but that doesn't matter at this point, the damage is done...

Maybe I am destined to be an old maid only to grow old alone with my child taking care of me. One can only hope I have such a great out come! Oh, well. What can I do at this point?

We did text a few times through out the night, light and simple -the way it should have stayed and I did send one last text this morning, apologizing to Mr. D for ranting on him like that. He's asleep right now so I haven't heard back from him and to be honest -don't know that I will.

What am I thankful for out of all of this... Great question. I'm happy to know that that part of me didn't die, but rather has been reawakened and ready to get back out there and find love again. Not sure how to do this as I hate the dating scene but I want to be married, I want to start a new chapter of my life with someone special -is it with Mr. D., who knows.

To the gym I go! I have a few loses ends to firm up!!

My adventures in dating... Part 1

2011-08-03T09:40:00.000-07:00

I've recently started talking with this guy -a really great guy. We'll call him Mr. D -for delicious! Mr. D and I have been talking since the beginning of July, or thereabouts, and things have really progressed well. We chat on Facebook, text or by phone every day. Our conversations have moved from "how is your day" to "how is your day" and we seem to be quite compatible on a number of important issues like family, marriage, children, etc...

As things go, we agreed that it was time to meet in person ( we have seen pictures via facebook). After all, we clearly had chemistry by text/phone, it was time to find out if there was something more there as well. (You realize this is huge for me -esp since it's been roughly six, yes I said SIX yrs since my last date!! I was reelin!)

SIDE NOTE: The thing about Mr. D. is that he works out of town (alot). He is currently working nights, which means he's awake when I'm sleeping. Either way, I had some free time this past weekend with Sophie away visiting Aunt Julie's house (no school/daycare next couple of weeks, needed a sitter) so we decided I would come down for a visit. Yes, I stayed in a hotel room -of my own. Get your' mind out of the gutter.

Mr. D is currently working in Baton Rough, LA -an Eight hour drive from here to there. I left really early Friday to arrive a few hours before he had to go to work that night. He stopped by the room for an hour or so before and we hit it off right away! We both agreed that there was defiantly chemistry and that the conversations flowed nicely between us. (I really like this guy!!)

Anyway, we visited each day over the weekend. He'd go to work and then come over to the hotel room in the morning and we'd spend the morning hours chatting, holding hands, even a little kissing. He'd eventually need to take a nap before heading back to work for the night... So sweet to miss all that rest for me!! Did I mention that I really like this guy? He'd get to work and we'd text all night long and in the morning still have plenty of conversation left.

MORE TO COME...

ChoiceHotels.com

2011-07-15T09:44:00.000-07:00

We were planning for our vacation and a friend mentioned that she gets insane discount prices for hotels and that she'd send me the link. Great I thought, this will help so much -- and it did!! The prices were so wonderful!! $39 for one room at a Choice Hotel! Not bad... So after figuring out the driving times and places we wanted to stop I made reservations, via online through the friends and family link that was given to me. After wards I saw an ad on the page (same page, hadn't closed it yet) that stated I could "stay 2 nights and earn 1 night free". "Wow", I thought, this would be fun to use at random, so I signed up. I read over the page as closely as I could, read every Astrix (*) and followed every additional link -just to make sure it was on the up-n-up. I printed out the information that was needed and made sure to bring along my new Member Number so the clerk could add it to my reservation upon check-in.

This was a complete bust! Tuesday I finally get around to checking the website/account to see if my "free" room is listed yet, which it was not, so I sent an email -still haven't heard back from anyone (and its not FRIDAY!!!).

As it's now the end of the week, and I still haven't heard back re: my email, I called today and have spoken with 2 different ppl about this... The first lady said I couldn't redeem points for the free room because I used the Friends and Family program pricing and it wasn't qualified. I accepted her answer and we hung up. I mean after all we did get great rates to begin with but then I got to thinking about it --No, I really looked over that site (page) pretty good and I never read anything along those lines, so I called back again.

The second lady went on to essential say the say thing, but this time I wanted proof!! She pointed me to the originally page where it stated that it must be "qualified rates". I stated to her that there is no indication that this was not a "qualified rate" and I wanted proof of what qualifies as this "qualified rate".... we've been on the phone now 38.21 min. After several attempts by her to prove this, only to be show further down that it did not apply to this situation, she finally found a place that sates programs rates with a discount of more than 20% off the room rate is non qualifying... dang it!! So upset. Not really, I suppose. I mean I did get this awesome rate for hotels -- that is enough, right?!?!

Anyway, I am now holding to place a complaint. Yes, I said I am placing a complaint. It's not right that this big company can't explain their self better. Even putting a simple little astrix next to the word "qualified rate" would have helped in this situation...

Did I mention that these ppl, at Choice Hotels 800#, are beyond slow!! In fact, slow is an understatement!!

However I am now talking with a nice "grandma type" lady who listens well and is typing my complaint up as we speak! I suppose they have her answering the "complaint" line because no one wants to yell at grandma -but I wasn't yelling either, so it worked out for me. Hopefully something good will come of this.... Kim at Choice Hotels -please read your email and get back with me.

57.07 min. total phone time!

Thoughts of Holy Week

2011-04-20T10:13:00.000-07:00

I was baptized in 2007 and am now a Baptist. I believe, I really do. I believe in the Bible, the truths it speaks about, and in Jesus, but sometimes I have questions but this is a whole other topic, not for today.

Today, I started reading my on-line Bible again. I can't claim the glory myself because the truth of the matter is it was because of a website I'm a "fan" of thru FB. Either way, I was reading again, and it felt great. Thou, I miss the friends I used to share this part of my life with... Even though its been years now since we've shared that, I still really miss it and I haven't been able to find a good replacement -Yes, I've been trying. Sometimes it just takes longer, right? :)

Anyway, it hit me while reading about the things Jesus did for us, for me, for my family, for my child, for my friend(s), for you.... Do I think I could do "it" if I were Him, sadly, no, I don't think I could but the good news about that is, is that I wasn't called for that -at least back then and who knows about my future! What about you, could you be that selfless?

I also got the chance to watch the movie The Book of Eli. If you haven't seen if yet, it was great. The ending was the best. Compiling all this together this morning; the reading and watching the movie the other night -I am just in Aw of Christ and so I pose this question to you... Are you in Aw of Christ? Being that it is Holy week and Christ died for you and me, have you thought about that this week? Have you stopped and thought what if it didn't happen that way? What if things were like in the Old Testament still? Ouch! Today I felt sorry for Judas, for his destiny, for his soul, which brings me to another topic I have...

I also stumbled across an article regarding: The edition of TIME magazine timed for Easter Week features a cover story on the controversy over Rob Bell and his new book, Love Wins. Interestingly, the essay is written by none other than Jon Meacham, the Pulitzer Prize-winning author and former editor of Newsweek –TIME’s historic competitor.

more from article: The standard Christian view of salvation through the death and resurrection of Jesus of Nazareth is summed up in the Gospel of John, which promises “eternal life” to “whosoever believeth in Him.” Traditionally, the key is the acknowledgment that Jesus is the Son of God, who, in the words of the ancient creed, “for us and for our salvation came down from heaven … and was made man.” In the Evangelical ethos, one either accepts this and goes to heaven or refuses and goes to hell. Bell, Meacham writes, “begs to differ” with this “standard Christian view.” He then relates that Rob Bell “suggests that the redemptive work of Jesus may be universal — meaning that, as his book’s subtitle puts it, ‘every person who ever lived’ could have a place in heaven, whatever that turns out to be. Such a simple premise, but with Easter at hand, this slim, lively book has ignited a new holy war in Christian circles and beyond.”

I do think my place in Heaven is secured because I chose to believe in Christ, that He came to this earth as both God and Man, that He lived a righteous life and that He died for me and my sins and the sins of others to come and that He rose again after 3 days to set at the right hand of God. Have you read John 12:25-26? (25) The man who loves his life will lose it, while the man who hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life. (26) Whoever serves me must follow me; and where I am, my servant also will be. My Father will honor the one who serves me.

What about Matt. 26:23-25: (23) Jesus replied, "The one who has dipped his hand into the bowl with me will betray me. (24) The Son of Man will go just as it is written about him. But woe to that man who betrays the Son of Man! It would be better for him if he had not been born." (25) Then Judas, the one who would betray him, said, "Surely not I, Rabbi?" Jesus answered, "Yes, it is you."

Surely this would mean that not everyone has a spot in Heaven. All this ties back into the article and the Bible pages I was reading. What are your thoughts, am I getting this wrong?? Please correct.

All about Sophie.

2011-04-14T13:36:00.000-07:00

Sophie will be turning 5 -next month!! Time sure does fly. It sounds so unreal when I say those words. She's a growing girl, that's for sure. Since we've moved back to the Fort Worth area, she has changed quite a bit. I suppose I have to tho.

When we were still in Madiosnville, I noticed Sophie was entering into that tantrum state; She would start one at the store, in the front yard, in the kitchen... Oh, how I hate those. For the most part I would walk away and leave her there, or get really mad and yell. Ganny and I never saw eye-to-eye on this. Either way, we are now in Fort Worth and I haven't seen one of those since our move! I'm soooo thankful!

I've also noticed that her and I do everything together. I didn't realize this until last night. But she has turned into my best friend -over night it seems. We paint our toes together, we do our hair, brush our teeth, sometimes we even play in the sprinklers together, we cook foods together, we clean house together, take care of the animals... the list goes on.

As much as I love this, I'm also a little worried, mostly for Sophie. Looking back, I can't pin point the time my mother stopped being my "mother" and became my "friend". Growing up I loved that my mother was so cool, so understanding and didn't seem to judge even when she should have. Looking back back, however, it wasn't so great. I think my life would have been a great deal different had I had a "mother" and not a "friend", so in turn I worry about Sophie.

Right now it's not a big deal, but if one keeps driving down this road, will I be able to let go, will she? Will I be able to tell her No when push comes to shove? I suppose its only natural to worry. But for now, I bring my most favorite picture of Sophie....

Can't you just hear her now... Mom, get out of here! This is my time in the potty room! lol.

Today is just not a good day. part 2

2011-04-14T13:26:00.000-07:00

However -- I have been busier then ever today, well, this week really. So nice. Not that I dislike having time on the internet, or multiple phone calls to my family -but keeping busy is nice. And this week has been a nice surprise!

Here is a picture of my baby. She can look soooo cute, but we all know the truth -devil in disguise! :)

Today is just not a good day.

2011-04-14T13:07:00.000-07:00

Have you ever had that feeling like no matter you do, it never turns out quite right? You don't say the right words, at the right time or you drop something that shouldn't have been dropped.... Ug. That's kind of me today. The funny thing about it, is nothing's happened today. Well, except that my mother came for a very quick visit and is now heading to Wisconsin for a few months. Maybe that's it! I just miss my Mommy! hmmm.

Not only that, but I can't seem to get my hunger under control today. This could cause BIG problems in the end... literally... the end. lol. I crack myself up sometimes. lol. Either way here's an account of my food intake -just for today:

Breakfast: Whataburger B.O.B & OJ
Mid AM Snack: dried fruit snack pieces thingy's; gum
Lunch: microwaved Sweet potato with lots of butter; gum
Mid PM Snack: More dried fruit pieces; gum
Mid-Mid PM snack 100 cal choc. cookies; gum
Mid-Mid-Mid PM Snack: snack pack of those sticks that you dip in the cheese; gum
Mid-Mid-Mid-Mid PM Snack: Seriously thinking about eating some cheese its!

Is this not sad or what..... Must be that time of the month. Sorry guys. Just a girl thing! Maybe Sophie and I will go out for dinner. I hear the Italian Rest. has great dessert!

Life part 2

2011-03-21T12:27:00.000-07:00

My job in Madisonville wasn't something to be desired. My boss and I never quite saw eye-to-eye on things; His way of teaching was more of a dictatorship and my way of learning is more hands-on (trial and error, maybe).... Not a great combination in the end. Every day it seemed I would cause him more stress and in turn, it caused me to be stressed, which I would bring home and take out on my family -just ask them, they will gladly tell you what a monster I could be! So I again was looking for a new job.

Since it was such a small town, you couldn't really search within the city limits for a job -for that matter, it was hard to search for a job anywhere he practiced law even if it wasn't within the law field (Small town + money to spend = well known!). Sad part is, is that I had been offered a few different jobs throughout my 1.5 years there but turned them down b/c I kept thinking things would get better at work. We would have a "argument" and things would get better for a few weeks, maybe a month or two, but then would go right back to where we were - vicious little circle. At this point I would have jumped at just about anything...

During this time I had stayed in contact with my old boss in Fort Worth. He sold off the company I was working at and eventually opened up a new company with additional partners and offered me a job. I jumped at the opportunity. Small town life was hard for me and working in a job that I was so completely unhappy at just wasn't worth staying around for... So Fab. 2011 Sophie and I moved back to Fort Worth!

I mentioned cats earlier… Sophie wanted a kitten. Mom and I started talking about and agreed another cat would be nice to help chase “things”, so we started looking. We went the local vet and he offered us some abandoned cats (brother and sister) for free. Mom and I loved them, they were more mature (3-5 yrs old), fixed, house trained, somewhat playful, which meant that Sophie didn’t like them at all and since we were “technically” getting the cat for her… We found them a new home (Thanks Julia).

We found another kitten (yes, I said Kitten). We named him Pickles! He would have been a great cat except he wanted to play at 3 am –every morning! And he would cry….all night. Ug. Just got to be sooooo much for us. So when I moved, I didn’t want to bring him along, Mom couldn’t take him to Julie’s house –so we found him another home too. (Thanks again Julia! (a friend from the Courthouse in Madisonville)).

I also mentioned a new vehicle… Well I found out that driving a little car in a small town isn’t easy either; dirt roads, pot holes the sizes of mountains, dust/mud; child growing who now puts feet on back of chair! Yuck. So while in Madisonville I opted for a new vehicle. I got a Dodge Journey and thanks to my wonderful brother-in-law –I even got employee pricing! I’ve greatly enjoyed my new vehicle. There is so much more room for Sophie. She even played soccer last summer, and we had plenty of room for the extra things like chairs!

So here we are in Fort Worth. I’ve been back with Lindsey almost 1 month and I’m love it. It’s quite tho and I miss having the girls from the last office to chit-chat with but I am much happier now and that is far more important to me, plus I can call people on the telephone during work hours if I really need to chat with someone.

All for now, will try to keep this up-to-date more now.Sophie and I still have lots to tell you about…

On a side note: God does work in mysterious ways... I don't know why He brought us to Madisonville; maybe it was to renew a friendship with my sister, maybe it was to give Sophie some much needed male-attention (thanks Uncle Billy for treating Sophie more like your own child and not some kid your wife is babysitting), or maybe it was to show me what a monster I could be and how it feels to have that turned on yourself... idk, but I am glad I had the experience in the end.

Life.

2011-03-21T10:38:00.000-07:00

Oh my gosh, where to start... Things just keep moving right along in life, don't they? Don't answer that it was more of a rhetorical questions, really. :)

Well let's see, from the last post I made ( November 15th, 2009) a lot has happened.
1) We've moved, twice; 2) have gone through 3 cats and added a new puppy; 3) Sophie turned 4 and is about to turn 5 now; 4) bought a new car; and 5) started a newer job -back in Fort worth. I would say our life has been any but boring!

So let's begin.. I will do my best to keep everything in order for you.

We moved to Madisonville, Texas (3 hrs South of Fort Worth) in October of 2009. My job in Fort Worth wasn't providing what we needed and it was not moving in an upward fashion, so Julie rallied for me and found me a job in Madisonville with an Attorney. The job seemed promising, offering long-term growth, and a chance to be closer to family. So we moved and began a new life in “small-ville”.

The first house we moved into was located in Midway (about 10 miles East of Madisonville), also known as the one filled with Scorpions! We only stayed for 9 months as the Homeowners came for a visit once and decided they'd like to move back. I agreed, especially since they were sweetening the pot a little (lol), and we moved a few weeks later to another house this time located in Madisonville.

This house was a 3/2/2 on private land and surrounded by cows! It was a perfect fit for us as everyone had their own room!! Sophie could go outside to play without me having to worry about traffic (nearest road was about .25 miles off). The dogs loved it too; Peanut (our newest addition) could fit through the "cow-fence", so she would chase all the cows and Sam would run up to the hill and chase the Ginni's. Crazy dogs!

Don't get me wrong, this house came with it's faults as well. No we didn't have scorpions but we did have a few additional snakes and our heater went out during winter! Luckily the house was built with a wood burning fire place with a built in fan to heat the house. So, after a few much-needed lessons on how this nifty fire place worked and how to keep a fire going through-out the night, we were again with heat! Between Mom and I, we did a pretty awesome job keeping the house hot! And what was even better was that b/c the heater went out (something the homeowner is required to provide), they instead provided us with as much firewood as we needed! :) All-in-all, we actually enjoyed it very much. But sadly, this house didn't last either...

more to come in my next post... keep reading!

The big scare of the day!

2009-11-17T10:35:00.000-08:00

Sunday, November 15th, 2009. It's a normal Sunday as any other Sunday might be... we get up, be lazy on the couch, eat some breakfast, get ready for Church, go to Church, come home and for what ever reason today, I decided to try my keys at our side door. With mom moving in today, it would be nice to park on the drive way and go in through that door... Sadly, the keys don't work so Sophie and I walk around to the front door, which is our normal door to use.

We have a pretty big front yard. Our house sits on an acre of land and the house is somewhat in the middle -so there's lots of room! Anyway, walking up to the front door there is a small patch of grass between the house and the side walk, which just so happens to be where Sophie is walking and playing and picking little flowers and walking and OH MY GOSH WHAT IS THAT?????? Scare the bagibbies out of me, yank Sophie's arm practically out of socket and immediately run back to the car and after 5 seconds of being completely and utterly freaked out, I call Uncle Billy to the rescue (who was at home very sick today). He asks "what is it?", "Its, its, its... a SNAKE, a big huge SNAKE," I shout!! [He was huge too. He was about 2" thick and about 2-3 feet long, but I never saw his head.] I was so freaked out that I was starting to hyperventilate -you know on tv you see people do that and the screen kind of goes blackish around the sides and all you can see is through a hole of some sort... Well, it's true, that's what it was like for me. I kept thinking "you can't pass out, it'll eat you!"

So Sophie and I are now back at the car, about 20 feet away and I have Sophie playing on top of the car because there is no way you are getting down kiddo and we patiently wait for Uncle Billy to come fix another problem -again. The whole family shows up -not just Uncle Billy, but Julie, William, Annon, and Cara! They all want to see "the show" because Uncle Billy brought his gun to shoot it! I told him I've been watching that area, making sure it didn't move -- like there was something I could do if it wanted to move!?!?. Anyway, he goes over there, and it's gone! It moved!! "WHAT?!?! I've been watching that whole area and he hasn't moved, how can you not see him, he's huge!" but sadly he did move --- under my house! yes, there is a crack, a pretty good sized crack, that he slipped into. But luckily Uncle Billy knew what he was doing and sealed it up for me... I know what you are thinking, and yes, I know too... it'll just come out in another area -BUT IT WON"T BE HERE!!

Turns out, this was just a Rat Snake. They are pretty harmless, but I didn't know that. They eat rats and field mice and such, actually pretty good to have around the house being that I live next to fields of openness!!

Just an FYI though... this wasn't the first snake we had found at this house, it was just the biggest and it scared the daylights out of me. The first snake we found was in the back yard under a piece of tattered door that had been there awhile. He was a small, only about 12 inches long, tiny little thing, maybe 1/2 grown -- he was a COPPER HEAD and the guys who were helping put in the fence, killed him for me and then buried the head!! Copper heads are the deadly kind and it's best to bury the head so it doesn't accidentally get you and inject what ever venom it still has in its fangs. For what ever reason, this one didn't really scare me...

Mom however, stopped by Home Depot and picked up some Snake Be Gone stuff which I've heard great things about around here... Mouth Balls DO NOT WORK!

Ok, gotta go... that's been my exciting life over the last few weeks. I hope everyone is having a wonderful day!

The new house

2009-11-16T10:49:00.000-08:00

The new house.... Pictures to follow soon

It's a great looking house. Sure it has its little issues, but I'm not buying the house, just renting and the land-lady agreed to knock-off some rent for the additional work I already intended to do... so, how great is that -NOT.

This house needed so much more then I realized. Even completing the little things I agreed to are more then I realized they would be... things like, filling the gaps around the windows (outside & in) or caulking around the bathtubs or putting in a fence to keep my dogs... Oh my! The fence part was easy, it's the gaps around the windows and doors that scare me.

Here's what I have found so far: Since we have SCORPIONS, yes, the little boogers that sting you with their tail-scorpions, we need to re caulk or seal, any minuscule opening we find whether it be on the floor or ceiling or around an electrical socket or in the bathroom (especially the bathroom) or kitchen or window or... As you can imagine, this is a huge project but so far we're doing good! I have gone through about 4 tubes of caulking with another 3 on stand-by! And, I've had the exterminator out to the house 3 times since we've moved in --respraying for scorpions!

I also agreed to seal up the gaps around the windows outside and inside as well -thinking just a little caulking will go a long way... Wrong! I had to buy "Great Stuff." Its a foam type sealer, then because it drys Yellow, I need to go back around everything with white caulking to make it look pretty again! Ug. Well, as it stands I have the Great Stuff portion done, now I just need to go back around everything with white caulking to cover up the ugly yellow and to finish sealing the smaller cracks... Anyone wanna help???

So we have scorpions -- that's ok because as mentioned, I have an exterminator!! So far he has visited my house 3 times and we've only been here since mid-October!!! But by golly, I'm not loosing this battle!! Those boogers scare the living day-lights out of me! I panic with each sighting... so far I have killed 8, yes 8, but I'm told that's a pretty low number and I have found 4 dead. We have found 3 alive, trying to come in through the window area but luckily my sister and Aunt put up some plastic window insulation stuff and it kept them from getting in -- it also kept me from killing them though. They say you can go through your house at night with a black light and they will glow and from there you can pick them up with tongs or something and destroy them -but I am NOT doing this. So I call the exterminator guy and he talks me down some because after all, he can only spray once every 14 days. Right now I am on a monthly plan until things are better under control, at which point I'll move to a 3 month plan.

Big scare of the day....coming next!

The Next Move....

2009-11-16T10:39:00.000-08:00

So while I was away on vacation, my sister had the job of finding me a place to live in Madisonville. It's not an easy job by any means but I knew she could do it!

So here we are on our way to Madisonville, in the rain and we pull up to this white "farm-style" looking house. I couldn't believe this was my new place. I think I was already so upset by the days events that nothing at this point would have made me happy. As it was, the house wasn't ready for us to move in but they agreed to let me put my things in the garage for a few days until the house was complete. Turns out, this wasn't such a bad thing after all. So the next day, or so (can't remember now) we come to the new house for a quick tour and wouldn't you know it... the house is too small! Not enough space for 3 people (mom was moving down with us, just at a later date). So anyway, Julie and I started looking for house again. I had until Monday to find a new place before I completely lost the deposit paid on the house! Low-and-behold, we found one. It just so happened to be the very first house I looked at while I was still in town for the job interview!! This house is 2 bedrooms, but the master bedroom is huge. Sophie and I are currently sharing the room and even with the divider up, the 2 parts are still bigger then the rooms at our last house in Fort Worth!! Wow!!

So, now the task is to load and unload once again all my things. We now have to reload everything from house "A" garage and move it to house "B" -within 3 days and then start work that following Monday!! Not an easy task by any means. I think Julie and I did most of the moving this time around, with the exception of a few men for the heavier stuff!! but all in all, it went pretty well.

So here we are at our new house...

More to come in the next post......

Wow, it's been a while!

2009-10-21T10:47:00.000-07:00

Hi all. I know it's been a while since my last post, to be exact about 4 months. :)

Most recent events...

Job Interview: My sister had been soliciting my resume around Madisonville for the past couple of months. Finally she had given a copy to Mr. John Bankhead, the local attorney for these parts. He didn't need anyone new at that time but as it turned out the original girl wasn't working out so well and as John states "he just couldn't get my resume out of his mind" so on 9/16/09 I came down to Madisonville for a quick interview before heading to Wisconsin for vacation. Well, really it wasn't a "job interview" as he and I had previously talked about most everything via the telephone earlier that week, this was more of a formality meeting, an official acceptance meeting I suppose.

Well, the interview went well and I was hired! As many of you know, my current job situation wasn't the greatest... mostly a money issue but its a pretty big issue to have and since I had been asking God to lead me in this situation, how could I say No now? So here I am, in Midway Texas, about 3 hours South of Fort Worth, straight down I-45!!

Vacation to Wisconsin: After the job interview of 9/16/09, we (Mom, Sophie & I) took off for a mini-vacation to Wisconsin. The vacation had been planned for a short time before the interview, but I couldn't miss the interview and didn't want to miss the vacation since I knew I wouldn't be getting another one for a while... So we left on Friday evening and arrived late Saturday. It is much harder driving with a small child then I realized. However, Sophie did great!! We brought along a portable dvd player and lots of Dora, the Explorer dvd's and she was set!!! We did stop a bit more this time, but that was ok - kept her busy!

Moved to Midway, Tx: So let's see, we arrived home on Saturday, Sept. 26th. Unpacked the car, let mom go home and rested the rest of the afternoon. Sunday we went to Church and visited with friend for the last time. Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday we packed! I had lots of help thanks to all my wonderful friends in Fort Worth and Wedgwood Church! Thursday and Friday Lydia & I held a Garage Sale. I mean really, who wants to take items along you don't want or need! Saturday we loaded up and headed out!! It was beyond emotional! The days leading up to the Move weren't so bad, but then it all seemed to hit me and I cried most of the day! Ug.

My family from Madisonville came up with 2 trucks and 2 trailers. One of each loaned to me through my now new boss! The loading went pretty well. We ended up loading the 2 trailers and 3 pick up trucks -- FULL. However, it started to rain towards the very end of the loading and then preceded to rain the entire drive down to Madisionville and continued while un loading! I cried, and cried, and cried some more. Such an emotional day to begin with, then add the rain which was damaging my things! Ug. I think in all, I cried about 3 days. :(

More to come in the next post... the next move!

Sophie's big day

2009-06-30T13:25:00.001-07:00

Sophie had her first Big-Girl Sleep Over this past Sunday night at a friends house. She did great and is looking forward to her next one...

Aimee and I had been talking about a sleep over since April/May of this year, since her son had his sleep over and did so well with it. Aimee (& family) are very busy people but we were finally able to plan a date for it which just happened to be this past Sunday night -no school yet for Sophie, so Sunday night worked out well!

Aimee did great with them too. Last week the Ball family were away at Church Camp for 4 or 5 days, then they had family arrive Thursday afternoon (and staying until Thursday of this week) plus they had Sophie over for a sleep over... WOW!!

We decided it probably would work best if we had dinner together and then I just let for the night. So Sunday night we had dinner at the Ball house (btw, it was a great home cooked roast! YUMMY) then we chatted for a short time after and at about 9:00 or so, I left... No crying, no screaming, no nothing out of Sophie. She was already having such a great time with Rayne, Colby and baby Jacob I don't think she even really noticed me leaving!

Aimee did mention the next morning that Soph did ask for me once or twice but Aimee told her I would be by tomorrow to pick her up, and with that she turned over and went to sleep for the night! Wow. I can't even get her to do that lately!!

The next morning Aimee had those kids up and at'em... Work out at Beckie's house at 9am, then took all the kids (including Beckie's 2 boys) to the Splash Pad, then home for a short time to rest before heading to the ZOO!!! WOW! I can't imagine what Aimee was thinking! Aimee's boys were the good kids who took a nap like they were supposed too, while the girls wined their way out of it...

While chatting with Aimee Monday, I had asked to join them in visiting the Zoo and before you know, we were all piling in 2 cars and we were off (work was slow to say the least)... And besides, Monday was such a great day for the Zoo; the weather was very nice, around 90 the whole day! Whereas the last few days had been in the triple digits...

I think everyone had a great time, including James' mother and sister! Plus, the Zoo had some water-play stations set up which helped cool the kids down . We even stopped for ice cream while there! Yummmm. I think we made it through about half the park before it was closing time... 3 hours we were there!! And the kids did great, even the little Missy's who didn't take naps!

Getting into the cars at the end however was another story all together! None of the kids were ready to go! Sophie eventually fell asleep -I say eventually, but really it was within 5 minutes of leaving the park! She was quite disappointed when she awoke to our house and not "Ms. Aimee's", who has apparently made a big impression on Sophie!!

So... the next one's on me... Can't wait to have the kids over for another sleep over! We won't do quite as much -- maybe toes, popcorn and fun movies! :) Ahhhh... this makes me happy!

Have you ever noticed...

2009-06-30T12:38:00.000-07:00

Weight Watcher's... day 117
State date: 3.05.09
Start Weight: 170.2
Last weigh-in: 156.0
Goal weight: 135 - Only 21.0 more to go!

So I've been losing weight lately and I've noticed a few things... like when I gained weight, it was mostly in my tummy area or that certain things shrink faster then other certain things... Ug! And, have you ever noticed that when you are losing weight, clothes start fitting funny... not like too big or saggy, but just different? I certainly have!

Today I am wearing pants and a blue top. I've worn this many times before, so it's nothing new, or different or anything like that but today, today they are not fitting like they should... and the only change really is that I've lost almost 15 pounds (that's a small child if you were wondering). My tummy is doing that "mushroom top" thing, which I completely HATE and my pants are falling down with every turn, which yes, is from them being too big - but still...mushroom top! Yuck!!

I can't keep going out buying new clothes either! Speaking of new clothes... I did just buy some new pants at JCP a couple of weeks ago. I think I blogged a little about that trip... They are the A.N.A. brand. If you don't already know, ANA is a great brand for the bigger girl! They have built in stretchy stuff so your pants start out kind of snug, then stretch to fit nicely... well, that is for the most part.

If I can get away with it, I won't wash my pants until the 2nd time around (and if I'm really lazy, the 3rd time around... lol) and with the ANA brand - that is not always a good thing. I wore my new ANA crop pants to Church Sunday, then was wearing them again Monday, but by then, they were already stretched to fit and then stretched even more, so they were too by Monday!! Ug. I suppose I shouldn't be complaining really... and I suppose I'm not complaining about losing the weight. I'm just complaining clothes don't fit like they should!!!

If there was one thing to do away with, it'd be shopping for clothes -that fit! It's hard enough trying to find something of a bigger size that doesn't look like a circus tent *itself*, then when you do find something, it's another thing trying to make sure it doesn't make *you* look like a circus tent while wearing it! I don't remember having these issues when I was younger and skinny-er. :)

Men -you should be nicer to women! I bet you don't have it nearly this bad... lol

Til next time... Hope you are having a fabulous day!

The big scare...

2009-06-11T07:26:00.001-07:00

Yeah, it's not what you're thinking... Last night we had some pretty big storms move through our area which seems to be the norm for our area this year, but last night a second wave came through around midnight or so and had me up at about 3am with all the thunder taking place.

Around 3:15am or so the power starts to flicker, which is very unusual for our street, and eventually goes out completely. Like the good mommy I am, I decided to check on Sophie, maybe uncover her some because as we all know, it gets hot with no air or fans! So at about 3:30am I get up to make my way down the hallway when I start hearing the wind whistling which is a little freaky but nothing big, right? Well then the rain starts hitting the bedroom windows which are back under my porch about 4 feet -and generally do not get wet during a storm!

At first it kind of sounded like someone was standing outside with a water hose lightly spraying the windows but then the wind picks up whistling even louder. Now, combined that with loud thunder, bright lightning and even louder wind -- I'm thinking its a Tornado and race down the hall to get Sophie -who by the way is sleep very peacefully. I grab her (scaring the heck out of her) and race for the nearest bathroom, hers.

Almost there, I trip! Yep, fell right on my knees, then to my side, then to my face! Yeah, it hurt!! Sophie was fine, I don't even think she realized we fell! :) Great catch, mom! On the way down I try to correct myself and grad the not-so sturdy shelf, which falls as well -along with all of its contents! So during all this I can still hear the wind whistling, the dogs are roaming all over the house, so I'm thinking its still coming and grab Sophie again, climb over everything that is now on the floor of the bathroom and crawl into the tub -- Have I mention yet that Sophie just happened to be playing with her bath toys earlier that day and forgot to pick them up!! Yea, I know, my butt felt every one!

So anyway, we are laying there, in the dark, and I'm thinking... Oh, God please don't let it sweep the dogs away!, then my thoughts move to... I know I'm bleeding. It hurts and I can't even see what or where it is! But was pretty ok with it because after all, if I am bleeding, at least I'm in the tub!! lol. Funny how you can rationalize things at 3am.

After a few minutes to half hour I decide if nothing has happened yet, nothings going to happen, so we crawl out of the bath tub, over the towels, magazines and whatever else happens to now be on the floor of the bathroom and make our way to my room for the night. Sophie is now fully awake and ready to talk or play or eat or needs a drink or... Around 4:30ish, I decide to check the news because I can still here the thunder quick well but by this point the news people have moved all coverage to the Dallas area and nothing more about Fort Worth! Ug. Finally get back to sleep around 5am!! Did I also mention that my alarm goes off at 5:30!!! Yea, sleepy today!!

This morning, after inspecting my very sore body and discovering only minor cuts and a few big bruises, I decide to look outside to see all the damage I know has happened and find only that my trash can lid had been blown opened and a screen was off!! Yeah, after all that!! Ug.

May today be an easy day!! :)

Weight Watcher's... day 88

2009-06-01T08:10:00.000-07:00

State date: 3.05.09

Start Weight: 170.2

Last weigh-in: 158.4 - Only 28.4 more to go

Ok, so a lot has happened since my last weigh-in... My little girl had her 3rd birthday party, I dropped a dress size and my dogs moved to my Aunt's house (for the party!).

Getting ready for Sophie's party was a little more stressful then I had planned. I mean, yes, I know there is planning involved as well as cleaning, and organizing, and sorting, and preparing, and buying, and setting up, and the anticipation of it all... but wow! was I nervous to have these people over to my home -but either way, I'd do it again. Well in fact, I suppose I will be in another year! lol. I haven't sat down to figure out if this actually saved me money or not, but that was the idea at least. Will look into it and let you know for your next party.

As for the dress size, I know it's not much -only one size, but it really does make you feel great when you realize the size hanging in the closet really is too big!! As I've mentioned in an older post, a friend from church passed along some of her clothing that no longer fit. They were a bit snug upon receipt but those have since become too big as well.

So yesterday I went shopping at JCP for a few items -mostly for just a few things to get me by. Ok -Yes, I bought entirely too much, but the good part is, is that I get to try them on again in the comfort of my home and then decide to return something -or not. :) And yes -they were a size smaller!! WoooHoooo. I was in a state of disbelief at first in the dressing room, then was over joyed with it. I can't remember the last time I wore that size!

And so you know, the dogs will be coming home soon. It's been nice without them though. Yes, it's sad to say, but it's true. I'm still looking for a good home for Sam, the great! (pictured below) So if you know of anyone.... (hint, hint!).

Its funny - I always figured I'd have a dog for my whole life, but after this little break, I'm not sure anymore. I mean I'll probably still have Sam for a good long while, but Lexi is old (12 yrs or so) and I always figured after Lexi I would get a little breed type dog but now I'm not so sure anymore.... hmmmm. I'm sure if Sophie had her way, we'd have a million dogs, but maybe I could get by with just some fish or something... Her cousin Cara has pet Rats and Soph just loves those! I wonder.

Ok, gotta run... Hope you are all having a blessed day! :)

weight Watchers... day 69

2009-05-13T07:18:00.000-07:00

Starting date: 3.05.09
Starting weight: 170.2
Last Weigh-in: 160.4 (5.02.09)

That's a total of 8 weigh-in's, at about 1.2 lbs per weigh-in, for a total of 9.8 lbs! Wow, Who knew I would last this long...? I am so proud of the progress I've made thus far even though, yes, I could be doing better then I have. But I'm still proud of my progress! :) Beside, it took a few years to put it on, how can I expect to take it off any different? Ok -let me just say, by golly, if it takes a few years to take it off, I'm seeking a surgical answer! :)

I do wish it can easier for me though but I suppose without some trials, you wouldn't know what you were made of -much like the rest of life! I suppose it doesn't help that I have a tendency to reward myself with the very thing I am trying to lose either... food!

In the past if I dropped 5lbs, I would say "Wow, I did great! Let's celebrate by going out to eat!!" :) Or, "I've had such a hard day/week -I just need something quick and easy -Pizza anyone?" I'm happy to report, I still have 1 frozen pizza in my freezer and when Lydia and I get together, my first food suggestion isn't pizza anymore!! I've went from eating pizza at least once a week to every other week (sometimes longer!). Big steps for me!!!

I am also happy to report that I have been eating more fruits and vegetables at every meal. I'm not a big fan of the veggies yet, so they are usually the first thing off my plate but that just leaves more time to enjoy the rest of my yummy food -without guilt! It's getting better with every passing meal though. :) I've also notice that it is putting forth a better example for my little one as well... she may not eat veggies like she used to, but at least she see's I am making an effort too and will take a Small bite too. Yea!! My next goal is getting her to eat something other than hot dogs and cheese!

Till next time... Have an enjoyable weekend blogger's.

Weight Watcher's... day 46

2009-04-20T08:11:00.000-07:00

Starting date: 3.05.09
Starting weight: 170.2
Last Weigh-in: 162.0

So I've been to 6 weigh-in's so far and I'm feeling good! I've dropped a whole dress size, received some wonderful clothing from a friend through Church and am looking better and better with each passing week!! :) Yeah me!!

Losing weight is definitely harder then I expected it would be... I suppose really, if you "fall off the band-waggon" it's harder to get back on again and I fell off Easter weekend! First, we had a birthday party (with yummy cake & snacks!), then Easter (with even yummier home cooking!)... I mean really, what do these people expect of me!!! Geesh. I will say this though, I at least tried not to over indulge myself -but it didn't work so well as my tummy still hurt at the end of the day from all the wonderful food I ate --what can I say! :)

In reality I suppose I haven't done so bad. I have noticed that for me it's better if I'm hard on myself. You know, give myself a guilt complex. However, if someone else gives me such a complex I'm more inclined to be angry with that person (thanks for that help, Mom!) rather than thankful for their help, but if I give myself such a complex, then all I can do is better.

I found this out with my money some years ago as well... If I just keep saying "I don't have any money" when I go shopping, even if I really do, I tend not to spend as much. Have you ever done that yourself?? Now don't get me wrong -I don't send myself into a deep depression or anything, but a little guilt for eating something your not really suppose too is fine I think -and it seems to help!

I have also found that I have great supporters... My family is wonderful in this area as well as most of my friends. I say "most" of my friends, because not everyone knows about WW yet. It's not like I wear a banner or something! But at least I have a few people I can turn to for that extra push when I'm really ready for take-out... thanks Aimee.

Also, I've found that my food habits are really changing -for the better I might add. This past weekend my Aunt and I went to Ennis for the Bluebonnet Festival. While there we picked up some Kolachi's (fruit filled) and Fried potato things... we shared all of it but wow! how my tummy reacted! It was not happy with all that junk food. ;) Good thing to note for later I suppose.

Ok, that's all for now... will journal more later.

Weight Watcher's... day 11

2009-03-16T06:50:00.000-07:00

Starting date: 3.05.09
Starting weight: 170.2
Last Weigh-in: 167.2

I had my first weigh-in Saturday... I've lost 3 lbs. exactly!! Yea. I've noticed in WW that people are very adamant about any additional ounces lost, like 3".2" ounces, or 4".6" etc... I'm not quite there yet - a straight number is just fine with me; though as I mentioned above, I lost 3 pounds exactly! :) My weigh-in days are now Saturday so I can meet up with some friends while at the meetings. Hopefully, that too will be an encouragement.

I was extremely happy with the amount lost -surprised really. I didn't think I had done a very good job last week as I stated in my last post but to be perfectly honest, I was secretly hoping for 5 lbs lost... I know, 3 is good. 3 is very good. And, 5 will come... I was talking to Aimee about it yesterday. Aimee is such a good encourager!! She was explaining how she had some up's and down's too and that it will come, not to worry! She makes you feel like she completely understands, cares enough to talk to you about it and then offers great advise! Thanks Aimee!!

Some days just seem a little harder then others but thankfully I have great friends who are going through the same thing as me!! I hope to grow closer to these girls as we get further into WW, maybe even gain some long-lasting friendships too!

Until later... keep counting!

Weight Watcher's... day 7

2009-03-12T11:04:00.000-07:00

So today is day 7 of my WW journey... and I don't feel any skinnier then I did a week ago! Ug! Though to be honest, I also don't feel like I've done as good of a job as I could have been either. Is it because I have those extra 35 points (weekly, not daily) to use besides my daily limit of 23 points? Maybe, but without them I definitely would not be on track!

So far, I have 10.5 "extra" points to use before Friday night... Saturday is my weight in day and also the start of a new week for me. They're not 'fancy' points though, as in they don't "roll over" to the next week -so you either use 'em or lose 'em. Hopefully, I'll lose 'em! :) But they sure come in handy at the end of the day!!

But I suppose, all-in-all, I'm definitely in a better place then I was 7 days ago. Maybe not lighter, but definitely a better place! I feel better, I'm eating healthier then ever before, my activity level is increasing, I'm taking vitamins (sorta), etc... all good things! Who knows, there might be something to this 'life change' after all.

Now, how to keep this momentum going... Any suggestions??

BACK STORY
My friend Aimee, from SSC, has been a big influence with deciding to join WW. She has 3 children -all 1 yr apart (just about), we are close in age, and we seem to get along pretty well... So I thought "well if Aimee is doing such a great job on this 'life change', then maybe I could too". Note: She's lost almost 20 lbs in 2 or 3 months!! Plus, we have another friend in SSC that has lost something like 60lbs in I think 6 months or so! I mean, how great are these women I know!!

So anyway, originally Aimee was just going to help me do this on my own (I couldn't quite afford to join just yet) by using the WW tools she already knows but we quickly figured out that that wasn't really possible. There is so much to know, so many questions I had and still have... points calculating, food choices, eating out choices, activity exchanges -you name it, I was asking about it... So I took the plunge and joined! I suppose, so far, it's not too bad! Aimee still helps me quite a bit -I just called her yesterday about eating out... Btw, I still did not make a very good choice! Quizno's is not healthy!! 7 points for a small (kid's meal) turkey and cheese sandwich!! :)

Happy eating to all.

Weight Watchers... part 1 of ?

2009-03-09T06:26:00.000-07:00

So I've officially joined Weight Watchers! Yep, I'm one of "those" people now... you know, the kind that stop and count every calorie, fat gram and carb!!! Don't be ashamed to go out to eat with me... soon, it'll be like second nature to me and you won't even notice it! :) Hey! You may even pick up a thing or two!!!

Watch out world... I'm coming back, only in a smaller form. :)

Time with little one's

2009-03-06T08:30:00.000-08:00

So this week Sophie spent sometime away... away, away, at Aunt Julie's house. It was nice to be without child for a little while, but to be honest -I was lonely for her! I've spent the past 3yrs with her by my side every day. To have her gone for 2 nights, was harder then I thought it would be. Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed my freedom. I was busy with activities both nights, but still to come home to an empty house or to wake up with no "Hold You Momma's" or "Rock me's" was hard.

Then my wonderful sister called this morning... bright and early. Claiming Grandma was suppose to be watching Sophie and Annon play while she took a shower... but wasn't and with this little 'free time' of theirs they got out the scissors and cut some of Sophie's hair... so much that she now needed a "pixi" hair cut! A Pixi hair cut I said!! OMG!!! ARE YOU SERIOUS!!!! A PIXI!!! She has such cute, long hair... never tangles, doesn't cry when we brush it... great hair and now we have to cut it off -all off!! YIKES doesn't even begging to explain the emotions. Thankfully, it was an "early" April Fools day joke. No hair cut needed... wooohooo!!! :)

Just be thankful for the time you have with your little ones... it passes by so quickly.

Email...

2009-03-06T08:20:00.001-08:00

Stunning Testimony from a man from Norfolk , VA. He called a local radio station to share this on Sept 11th, 2003, TWO YEARS AFTER THE TRAGEDIES OF 9/11/2001.

His name was Robert Matthews. These are his words:

A few weeks before Sept. 11th, my wife and I found out we were going to have our first child. She planned a trip out to California to visit her sister. On our way to the airport, we prayed that God would grant my wife a safe trip and be with her.

Shortly after I said 'amen,' we both heard a loud pop and the car shook violently. We had blown out a tire. I replaced the tire as quickly as I could, but we still missed her flight. Both very upset, we drove home. I received a call from my father who was a retired NYFD. He asked what my wife's flight number was, but I explained that we missed the flight. My father informed me that her flight was the one that crashed into the southern tower. I was too shocked to speak.

My father also had more news for me; he was going to help! 'This is not something I can't just sit by for; I have to do something. 'I was concerned for his safety, of course, but more because he had nevergiven his life to Christ. After a brief debate, I knew his mind was madeup. Before he got off of the phone, he said, 'take good care of my Grandchild. Those were the last words I ever heard my father say; he died while helping in the rescue effort.

My joy that my prayer of safety for my wife had been answered quickly became anger. I was angry at God, at my father, and at myself. I had gone for nearly two years blaming God for taking my father away. My son would never know his grandfather, my father had never accepted Christ, and I never got to say good-bye.

Then something happened. About two months ago, I was sitting at home with my wife and my son, when there was a knock on the door. I looked at my wife, but I could tell she wasn't expecting anyone. I opened the door to a couple with a small child. The man looked at me and asked if my father's name was Jake Matthews. Itold him it was. He quickly grabbed my hand and said, 'I never got the chance to meet your father, but it is an honor to meet his son. 'He explained to me that his wife had worked in the World Trade Center and had been caught inside after the attack. She was pregnant and had been caught under debris. He then explained that my father had been the one to find his wife and free her. My eyes welled up with tears as I thought of my father giving his life for people like this. He then said, there is something else you need to know. His wife then told me that as my father worked to free her, she talked to him and led him to Christ. I began sobbing at the news.

Now I know that when I get to Heaven, my father will be standing beside Jesus to welcome me, and that this family would be able to thank him themselves .When their baby boy was born, they named him Jacob Matthew, in honor of the man who gave his life so that a mother and baby could live.

This story should help us to realize this: God is always in control. We may not see the reason behind things, and we may never know this side of heaven, but God is ALWAYS in control.

Please take time to share this amazing story. You may never know the impact it may have on someone. God doesn't call the qualified, He qualifies the called. Give thanks to the Lord for He is good. His love endures Forever. Psalm 136:1

God's Words of Life

2009-01-15T08:01:00.000-08:00

The other night at MOPS I received a God's Words of Life. A Women's Devotional Bible. Today is really the first time I've started reading through it and I wanted to read something about Finances, so...

Devotional thoughts on Finances:
The New Testament is full of warnings about a god closer to home, especially to today's' believers: "You cannot serve both God and Money" (Luke 16:13)

Trying to do so is our downfall. What we tend to think of as prudent financial sense is often what the Old Testament believers thought of as prudent financial sense : playing both sides. Serving God and Money. Like those Israelites, we find people serving Money all around us. Our culture is permeated with it.

How do we know when we've made "making a living" more important than the living God? When we sacrifice freely of our time and energy at the altar of material gain. When we begin to feel safe because of our insurance policies, mutual funds and level of income - rather than because God's hands are holding us. At that point we've lost contact with the mighty power of the living God.

The Israelites turned from the living God to a pile of carved wooden blocks. Are you a New Testament believer who's turning -for all the "right" reasons -from the living God?

Edith Bejema

Just because this particular letter is about finances doesn't mean that's where it stops. I was secure, for a while, because of my finances. I had a great job with lots of freedoms and within the last 2 weeks I've filed for unemployment and additional state services but I don't feel scared or worried -why, I think it's because I know I will be taken care of. God has brought so many wonderful things into my life already I can only imagine what is yet to come.

Don't get me wrong -- I've had some down days where I've questioned quite a bit but I am slowly realizing there is no need. The Bible says:

The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not be in want. Psalm 23:1

Will a man rob God? Yet you rob me. But you ask, "How do we rob you?" In tithes and offerings. You are under a curse - the whole nation of you - because you are robing me. Bring the whole tithe in the storehouse, that there may be food in my house. Test me in this, says the Lord Almighty, and see if I will not throw open the floodgates of heaven and pour out so much blessing that you will not have room for it. Malachi 3:8-10

So do not worry, saying, "What shall we eat?" or "What shall we drink?" or "What shall we wear?" for the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Matthew 6:31-33

How does one learn to depend on God? By serving others, by giving of your time, or by your offerings (I'm sure there are many more ways as well). This is definitely something I would love to be more involved with... somehow.

Anyway, those were my thoughts this morning. What are your's? How do you depend on God? How do you serve?

Christmas 2008

2009-01-06T11:01:00.000-08:00

This year Christmas was a bit different. Normally I get a chance to visit with my sister and enjoy the day-after shopping, but not this year! Between her having sick animals (contagious) and my taking care of animals at home, there was just never a good time! Mom wasn't around this year either, and we tend to see her one way or the other.

Dad and Linda came for a visit, which I truly enjoyed! We had Christmas dinner at my place which is unusual and Aunt Pattie was over bright and early Christmas morning to help open presents and celebrate all the goodness that was. I truly had a great Christmas, don't get me wrong!!

There are just certain things one really comes to expect/enjoy and I didn't get to do some of those things this year... Like shopping with Julie the day-after, or helping (picking on) her while cooking Christmas dinner or yelling at all the kids to be quite!! :) You know, it's kind of like when people say they need snow for it to feel like Christmas... Well, I suppose I need these things for it to feel like Christmas. :)

Plus a side from that, things at the office aren't the best either... Money is tight and everyone can feel the pinch, including me. Hopefully we will all make it through with as little scrapes as possible.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year all.

MSN.com ~ Atheist Buss

2009-01-06T10:25:00.000-08:00

This deserves a complete post... I was searching around MSN.com and found this tid-bit of information surprising....

Basics: It's a campaign (mostly in the UK) for Atheist Buses! Yes, you read right!! The article goes on to say it started off as a joke by comedian writer Ariane Sherine, after which prominent atheist scientist Professor Richard Dawkins of Oxford University pledged to match the first £5,500 of donations by the public to start an actual campaign!! As a result the advertising campaign will be far more substantial than initially anticipated. The 800 buses, 200 of which will be in London, will be joined with two large LCD screens on Oxford Street and 1,000 adverts on the London Underground. here is the complete article.

I can't believe it!! Is this what the end will look like... Hate, disbelief, abhorrence? I can only imagine what's to come if this "campaign" were to spread. The Church has been working diligently on spreading the Gospel of God, spreading love and hope to all. I mean if you don't believe in God, or anything really, then what's left out there for you; who's left for you to answer too, what's too keep you safe from doing harm to yourself -and to others?? You'd pretty much have the right to do anything you pleased... who would you be answering too?? You can forget the small stuff like Keeping Christ in Christmas or In God we Trust on money... Pretty soon we'll have riots of angry people, special holidays -- division all over again!!

I sure to hope this 'campaign' doesn't get off the ground!!

Christmas shopping.

2008-12-08T06:51:00.000-08:00

This year I was really hoping not to spend to much $$ as I had been collecting items all year long for this very moment! Yet, I find myself searching for "just one more thing"... As though saying that what I originally thought was a nice gift for someone has somehow turned into a "That's just not enough" gift. I realized the other day, this happens quite often with me! I don't have enough humbleness in my judgement, I always second guess my works when really I shouldn't. I fall back into the old mentality that if I don't give enough, or the right items, then somehow my friendships won't last or will prove to be worthless (or something along those lines I suppose).

My neighbor, Lydia, however, makes"homemade" gifts (on occasions) -they don't cost a lot and yet they turn out so nice and are very thoughtful -and useful!! I wish I had more of that ability and forsight. I suppose this is something that I will continue to work towards and with God's help, will someday be accomplished! :)

Mondays!

2008-12-08T06:29:00.000-08:00

Monday’s are so hard for me... Most of the time I just want to roll over the other way and fall back to sleep in the nice warm slumber I was so rudely awaking from... Today is no different!

The past week has not been an easy one; Sophie was sick with Bronchitis since Thanksgiving, then this past Sunday (12/07) she accidentally had her elbow pulled out of place (Nursemaid Elbow (sp?)) which ended with an ER visit to have it reset... It's just been a trying week. My nerves are obviously working over time since I also have a fever blister (almost gone now) which as most of you know, I only tend to get if something is bothering me... though I can't think of anything really -just maybe need some quite Mommy time.

I have a lot to look forward to however; My Dad and Linda are coming for a visit, I still have a job, Mom is still "thinking" about moving back and I will get another chance to visit with my sister (if I have a dog watcher that is). Plus, yesterday we had our first official visit with baby Caleb!! He is so precious, and tiny…

I was telling Lydia how much smaller he seems compared to Sophie at that age -I suppose he really is quite smaller, I mean after all, she was 1 pound more then him at birth! He was a tiny little guy. But he is oh-soooo cute and cuddly! I was also noticing some of his features. It's funny -people would tell me that Sophie looked a lot like me but I never saw it really (Still don’t). I could pull out certain features but mostly they reminded me of her dad but with Baby Caleb I could immediately pull out certain features -mostly on his dad's side too. I noticed them originally through the pictures taken while still at the hospital... He looked a lot like Jon's dad -Distinguished already! Baby Cable will be a handsome man -no doubt about that.

So back to Monday's... This morning I am completely tired. My body is tired, my eyes are heavy and I have no energy! I suppose this could be a sign of illness, but I think it's mostly just being tired! I've been trying to get to bed early and not do my normal housework at night -you can tell too. Just stop by for a visit! (No, really, don't!) This week I hope to get things back in order! Wish me luck, and energy!

Love to all.

Caleb Alan Norvell

2008-12-05T11:17:00.000-08:00

Caleb Alan Norvell arrived on Thanksgiving at 9:32 pm. He's 21 inches long and weighs 6 lbs. 14 oz. Here are some photo's from Lydia's camera of the new addition.

I, myself, haven't gotten a chance to see the little guy just yet as Sophie has been sick and there is no way I want to get Caleb (or family) sick! So we are patiently waiting for our recent illness to pass... And I am glad to report -I see a light at the end of our tunnel!!

I don't think I've ever been so excited about a pregnancy before. I know that's sad to say, especially since my very own sister has had 4 of them! But I was young then and I hadn't had one of my own yet... Even Julie noticed the change in my deminor around children after I had mine. Oh well.

I can't wait to get a chance to hold Caleb; his pictures are just too precious!!

The ever surprising, God!

2008-11-19T08:02:00.000-08:00

Isn't it wonderful when all of a sudden it hits you... How awesomely gracious God is to you -even if it is only the little things you notice at first.

Like the other day for instance... I had a few errands to run during lunch and then needed to head to court for my boss. So the afternoon starts off with my visit to the Chiropractor, then stopped for some lunch where I picked up one of those Egg Nog flavored milk shakes and then headed towards court. Everything was fine; nothing out of the ordinary there, until I arrived at court. I was beyond thirsty bc, as good as the Egg Nog flavored Milk Shake was, I desperately needed something else to drink.

I had very, very limited change -yes even after digging through my purse, pockets and car I still only ended up with $.90 cents and let's face it, how many soda machines do you know of where it is less than a $1.00 for a drink??? Anyway, I decided I would walk over, you know, just to see and Voilá! only $.85 cents for a drink!! I know! I was excited too. It hit me when I got into the car... God is so gracious!!

Want another one...?

The following day I, yet again, had to go back to court for my boss but needed some change as the court does not make change for you! So I decided upon a Diamond Shamrock nearby and popped in for a soda. I go up to the counter and the guy there said "Is that all?", "Yep" I replied to which he said "Well then, have a good day!" I mean, how great is that... A free soda!!

Still, I needed some change. He was so nice, I hated asking especially since he just offered me a free drink but I did and even explained that I didn't mind paying for my drink if I could get some change but he still didn't charge me!!

Just further proves God is watching over us and providing for us each day! It also makes me feel good inside to know that even on the littlest of issues, He's still there! Maybe we don't always get the things "we" want, but we do get "things" and taking the time to recognize them is important, I think.

Hope your day is filled with little "things" too.

Momma's

2008-11-13T10:45:00.000-08:00

So my Mom made a comment a few days, or a week or so, ago and it's kind of stuck with me... She said "Well I thought you were happy I was gone", this being said when asking if she still plans to return to Tx or not. As much as this is true, it's not!

Don't get me wrong, I really like having my house back to "normal"; Not having to raise "2" children is a big relief, not having to explain my reasoning's re: Sophie and MY discipline, or having to scramble through piles on the counter's to find something, or stress bc something wasn't done right, or bed time's being missed, or... All these things add up and then boil over!

When she was hear, it didn't seem so nice... we were always bickering back and forth regarding one thing or another. Mom too -Not just me. I would get the ol' "Alright Donnie!" as to point out that she wasn't happy with me (Donnie being the boyfriend), or waving her finger around when the light turned green (even though it only just a split second ago turned green, like I was holding up the line or something), or giving me the "Alright, what ever you say..." to imply she was no longer listening to what I was saying (even though I had a perfectly good point), or breaking my perfectly good dog-house.! See, not only me!!

Still, I miss her. I miss having someone to talk with at the end of the day, to go over my thoughts with and to gain a second opinion -even if I don't take it, I miss someone older then age 2 to yell at, I miss having her presence around, I miss having a built-in babysitter (for the most part at least), but most of all -I just miss her! After all, she is my Momma! What what girl do you know doesn't love to have her Momma around??

I do hope, though, that if she does decide to move back to Tx that it will be a much better experience for the both of us. I guess a person gets accustomed to their way of living and it's hard to make adjustments!! Gosh, what will I be like when I get married? Yikes!

Plus, we'd have to move into a bigger place -- I mean really, it was just toooooooo close for comfort! Especially since Lydia and Jon will be moving! The house just isn't worth the trouble without great neighbors! :(

Afternoon all!

Amish Friendship Bread

2008-11-12T08:08:00.000-08:00

Turns out, I really don't care for it! I received my "Starter" from Lydia about 2wks ago and have been diligently working it until finally it was time to bake! I thought, at first, this smells really, really, really bad; there's no way this can taste any good! But after adding a ton of ingredients, it started to smell better, I even added raisins and a few pecans to mine. MmmMmm.

Well after the baking took place, my house smelled sooooooo-ooooooo yummy I couldn't wait to have some! But since it needed to cool a little I ended up waiting until the next day.... Mine made 2 loafs, so I brought one loaf to my boss' house while I was over there helping his Mom out with a dishwasher issue...

We had just a small piece after lunch and I thought "I just need more butter on top". Well I had some more this morning for breakfast, with extra butter, and I still didn't care for it!! Something about the flavor, like it needed more sweetness or something. I bet I did something wrong; I'm not a baker!! This just proves my point... No Sugar Cookies as Christmas Gifts this year. What about Popcorn? I'm pretty good with that.

Good luck to all who bake!

Jeffery, the office fish

2008-11-11T07:30:00.000-08:00

As most of you know, last week I put our poor little Jeffery to sleep. He was sooo sick! It was by all accounts, traumatic!! He was our beloved office Betta Fish with bright red, vibrant colors and wavy fins galore. :) I believe he was a happy Betta, in his fish bowl of life.

So the story goes... My boss was leaving for vacation last week and we both knew something was wrong with poor little Jeffery as he stopped swimming or eating like he should be -- we both kind of figured he'd be dead by the end of the week. Plus Betta's average life span is 2-5 yrs and we've had him 2 yrs at least, and you never know how old a fish is when you buy them.

Let me just say -I am a complete animal lover and being the animal lover that I am I immediately started doing some online research about Betta's and illness... You wouldn't believe all the different illnesses there are for fish! Anyways, poor little Jeffery had multiple issues from Fin Rot, to Ich, to parasites, to bacterial infections -oh, and did I mention he also had Swim Bladder (a fish bladder infection)!! Yes, the poor little guy! snif.

I decided I would try to save him, if I could. Turns out, I couldn't afford it; because he had so many "issues" I needed several antibiotics, costing about $50 or more, plus a lot of time -- He was a $4 fish! The Pet Store Clerk said my best bet was to put Jeffery in the freezer and let him fall asleep. I know, such a sad moment for me too. snif, snif. I liked the freezer idea, except that I was worried that he would freeze while still awake (or something along those lines) so when I got back to the office I started researching again of what to do now... Plus the internet said freezing fish not under anesthesia was NOT the thing to do!! Did I mention, Animal lover!!

The internet offers a wide verity of things to do in my situation from smashing the poor little guy against a wall, to chopping his head off, to euthanizing him... I chose to euthanize him! They suggested using Clove Oil, mixing it with some of his water (in a separate container) and then adding it to his water little by little --Its like anesthesia but for fish, and then you place him in the freezer. So I went to the local Walgreens to pick up some Clove Oil as the internet said "you should be able to find this at any drug store", turns out you can not! So back to the office I go, empty handed. By the way, Milk at Walgreens is on sale for $3 a gallon!

I continued looking around on the net and discovered that Clove Oil is a fancy name for Benzocaine, which is the active ingredient in Orajel -which I totally have! So I mixed Orajel in some of his water and slowly added it back to the bowl he was in... He immediately went crazy and then settled right down. I checked back in a few minutes and he was still breathing (did you know that Betta fish are Air breathers -yep! They don't need water to breath, but if they are without water for a long period they will die of dehydration.)

According to the internet, the "anesthesia" was suppose to put him to sleep and A) he would drowned from not swimming and collecting air or B) I could put him in the freezer to continue the process that way... So him still breathing meant I needed to add more anesthesia to his water. I did, and I waited a few more minutes until I couldn't see him moving or breathing anymore, then began to transfer him to a cup I could freeze him in... Turns out he wasn't quite a sleep yet! He went crazy!! But again, settled right down in his new home (cup) and into the freezer I placed him. By this point I had added quite a bit of Orajel to the water and I just needed to be patient for it to take affect. snif, snif, snif.

I did all this last Friday afternoon. All week I had been thinking about this... He was getting worse with every day and I knew if I had to do this, then it would have to be on a Friday otherwise I would be back checking on him every few minutes and tormenting myself over this... The weekend was pretty terrible but all in all, I think it was the right thing to do! And yes, I did say a little prayer for Jeffery. :)

PS: I told my boss if he was to get a new fish... it needed to run on batteries!

Boo! at the Zoo - Pictures are up.

2008-11-03T06:28:00.000-08:00

Go to ... Holly's Picasa Site to see all the October 2008 pictures.

Enjoy!!

McCain or Obama --Update.

2008-10-31T07:41:00.001-07:00

I early VOTED yesterday! :) Be proud, I type before you an offical voter of McCain's!

I also met this very interesting guy while standing in-line. He sold his business and moved here from Florida a few years ago and has since started working for an Electrical company while opening his own on-line Travel Agency! He seemed like such a nice person -thought I would give him a plug... Mike Sapp with www.BigDreamsVacations.com.

Ps: H A P P Y H A L L O W E E N !!!

Cookies

2008-10-31T07:28:00.000-07:00

This year, for Christmas (I know it's a little early), I was thinking of baking some cookies to go along with my gifts for daycare and my SSC (cute, thoughtful but yet inexpensive)... You know those big, thick decorated cookies you get at Starbucks for $5 each...? I would like to make those. I think they are sugar cookies but am not sure. I also have no clue how to get them so thick or how to get the icing hard so it won't rub off on the wrapping! Any suggestions for all the above???

I'm NOT a baker by any means so I need a little help... What are your thoughts or suggestions? Should I just stick to the Pillsbury cookies? Is it even worth the trouble of baking? I would have to do a trail bake beforehand -just to see if it's even something I could do -- ugg.

Oh, the troubles I face! :) Any suggestions would be welcomed.

Romans 14:1-4

2008-10-30T14:23:00.000-07:00

NIV:
Accept him whose faith is weak, without passing judgment on disputable matters. 2One man's faith allows him to eat everything, but another man, whose faith is weak, eats only vegetables. 3The man who eats everything must not look down on him who does not, and the man who does not eat everything must not condemn the man who does, for God has accepted him. 4Who are you to judge someone else's servant? To his own master he stands or falls. And he will stand, for the Lord is able to make him stand.

The Message:
Welcome with open arms fellow believers who don't see things the way you do. And don't jump all over them every time they do or say something you don't agree with—even when it seems that they are strong on opinions but weak in the faith department. Remember, they have their own history to deal with. Treat them gently.
2-4For instance, a person who has been around for a while might well be convinced that he can eat anything on the table, while another, with a different background, might assume he should only be a vegetarian and eat accordingly. But since both are guests at Christ's table, wouldn't it be terribly rude if they fell to criticizing what the other ate or didn't eat? God, after all, invited them both to the table. Do you have any business crossing people off the guest list or interfering with God's welcome? If there are corrections to be made or manners to be learned, God can handle that without your help.

Ok, today I am finishing up on Romans and this chapter stuck out. I am sooooo guilty of this! Its scary to see this written in the Bible. It's such an important matter, one I am guilty of taking lightly. But its also reassuring to see it written in the Bible because that means there is hope and mercy waiting for me... I promise to do better on this issue! :)

Boo! at the Zoo

2008-10-29T07:23:00.001-07:00

10.28.08
We went to Boo! at the Zoo last night. I was a little worried that Sophie wouldn't have a good time. I mean, when we go to the grocery store and pass through the Halloween section, it scares the bagibies out of her and the tickets for Boo! at the Zoo are not cheap ($12 for anyone over age 2 and $4 for 2 and under). But we had such a great time! (check back for pictures)

We met with Aunt Pattie at Chili's, had some dinner and then headed over to the Zoo at about 5:45pm. OMG! The car line (to get into the parking lot) was sooooo long but once we got in, the line for tickets was almost non-existent. :) We brought along Sophie's waggon -which I wouldn't do again. It was too big with so many little one's around -it just got in the way more then not.

The coolest thing, I thought, were the ticket stubs (I know!). They had a perforated edge with smaller tickets stubs (6 each). You turned those in to get a small handful of candy and each candy stop had different types of candy! Towards the end of our trip a lady and her child were on their way out and handed us some additional candy stubs, which I gladly accepted. We used 2 of the 6 and then handed off the other 3 to another family. We ended up with 2 full bags of candy!

The animals weren't out much after dark but the Zoo made up for it with all the other activities they had for the kids. They had this one area with a bounce house, bobbing for monsters, ghost tossing, a monster stage and all sorts of other things. I think we made it as far as the Penguins and then turned back around. We stayed about 2 hours, but we were all tired upon leaving!

All-in-all, I think we all had a great time and I certainly wouldn't mind returning next year.

PS: Don't forget to dress the kiddo's up! I didn't dress Sophie up b/c I thought it was suppose to be cold but 90% of the other kids were and they were SOOOO cute. Next year!

Arbonne party -you're invited!

2008-10-27T13:16:00.000-07:00

My good friend Lydia hosted an Arbonne party a couple of weeks ago; I had so much fun that I agreed to host a party myself... Guess what? You're invited too!

Join us for a journey into a season of wonder and wishes, courtesy of the Arbonne holiday line. Revelry or relaxation, dazzling the town or dimming the lights, a gift to yourself or a perfect something for others; wherever your fantasies lead, Arbonne's holiday delights will take you.

It will be hosted at my house on 11/15/08 at 9:30 am. Breakfast items will be served, so come hungry! Please email, or leave a comment on this page, if you plan to join us.

Oh, and did I mention that my little one will be there too. Yep, as you know our "sitter" moved back home about a week ago! :) --> Scratch this. Lydia is babysitting Sophie that day. :)

An Ode to my sister...

2008-10-27T13:04:00.000-07:00

Sometimes, in life you run into an extraordinary person...One who changes you. And sometimes if you are lucky, they change you in more ways than one. I am one of the lucky ones -I have my "extraordinary person" on speed dial, my sister!!

My sister put it best when she said "When you sit on the floor and see the back side of someone’s cross stitch - it looks such a mess. This is our lives. But, when you turn it over - you can see the beautiful plan and design, you now can understand all the colors..."

My sister has woven many wonderful colors into my life. Our childhood wasn’t perfect (eh, whose is?) but there are many parts of it I wouldn’t trade for anything in the world! And the shared happy memories with her are one of those parts. She’s my sister, my friend, my hero, my inspiration.

My ode is to you, Julie, and everything you are and stand for. I thank you for your kindness, your care, your concern, and especially for your love. You are everything anyone could ask for in a sister. Thanks for being mine!

Note: I have many extraordinary people in my life and maybe one day I will write an Ode to them as well, but today is a dedication to my sister... :)

Anyone need a POP!

2008-10-27T11:28:00.001-07:00

Have you ever had problems with your bones? My suggestion... don't go see a chiropractor! No, just kidding. I've been seeing one for about a week now and have already noticed some improvements!!

At first when my wrist starting hurting (about a year ago) I sot help from my medical doctor - who after doing some sort of pushing and pulling exam, decided it was the start of Carpal Tunnel Syndrome. She prescribed some anti-inflammatory medicine and told me to wear a wrist guard. Well after a few weeks, the pain was still there and instead of taking an x-ray to further see what was wrong, she then decided is was a pulled muscle from holding my daughter too much!! Either way, after a few more weeks of working with her I decided to stop everything all together. My wrist never got better; I only started protecting it -which I've since learned was not a good thing.

The pain was mild for a while but eventually grew into a burning sensation and hurt all the time. Now I have no medical insurance (I know!) so Mom suggested I seek help from a chiropractor... He x-ray'd, took measurements, we chatted -an overall exam really and came back with -I have a few bones out of join in my wrist/hand area (There are about 7 bones in that area and I have 3 out). He hopes to have it fixed within 6 visits, + some awful medicine!

By the way -just because your doctor said you should take this medicine, doesn't mean you should. And just because he said those "Symptom’s" weren't from the medicine, doesn't mean they aren't! I was taking "Optimal Acute" to help aid in the recovery of my wrist but was having horrible side effects, so I looked it up online and found I might be allergic to a derivative of Pineapple! Anyway, he said I was the only patient, out of about 70 who he's prescribed this to, that has had any complaints! Go figure. Anyways, we've now changed to something else (Optimal Chronic) and I haven't had any of the side effects since! Yea!

So far I've seen him 3 times and I've already noticed some improvement. No, it's not completely better and yes, it still hurts -but nothing like it was! I hope within the next few visits to notice some great improvements!

Seems like no matter how many times you visit a Chiropractor, your are never done!

Today is a day of Updates...

2008-10-24T12:50:00.000-07:00

Vesicoureteral Reflux
I've chatted with Natalie a quick minute an she said Anne did great! The surgery went well -they were even home the next night! They told me that we would be in the hospital for 2-3 days, then home 2 wks form daycare. Nat said by the next day Anne was moving-n-groven like nothing had happened. How impressive is that!

Praise to God!

McCain or Obama OK, after some careful thinking... I choose not to vote! No, just kidding. I'm still up in the air really. They both have some good points about them and neither is really a very good candidate -why can't we just have someone honest, with a little integrity! Ugg. As Lydia said, You have to choose the lesser of the two evils... Truth be told, I will probably vote McCain, though I have a feeling he won't be winning this race. :(

Decision 2008!
Have I mentioned that Mom has decided to move home... temporarily at least. Well she did! She left Tuesday, finally. She was hoping to leave Monday night (around dinner) but she was waiting to hear from her BF as to when they would be leaving CA (remember he is a truck driver). Mom was planning to pick him up along the way so "they" could drive home together! I know, you don't have to say it! Ugg. Oh well. She's home now but I haven't really talked with her much. I suppose she is pretty busy visiting - I know I would be. :)

It's nice to go home (Wisconsin). The feeling is so different then here. I don't quite know how to explain it -it's just a nice warm feeling you get! I guess kind of a sigh of relief maybe.

Vesicoureteral Reflux

2008-10-16T13:24:00.000-07:00

This is something that my daughter, Sophia, has been diagnosed with earlier this year and they've now recognized it to be hereditary -which is kind of scary because I would like to have more children. Even Sophia will have to watch for this in her children!

Description:
When the ureters enter the bladder, they travel through the wall of the bladder for a distance in such a way that they create a tunnel so that a flap-like valve is created inside the bladder. This valve prevents urine from backing-up into the ureters and kidneys.
In some children, the valves may be abnormal or the ureters in the bladder may not travel long enough in the bladder wall, which can cause vesicoureteral reflux. Vesicoureteral reflux is a condition that allows urine to go back up into the ureters and kidneys causing repeated urinary tract infections. The reflux of urine exposes the ureters and kidney to infection from bacteria and high-pressure, which is generated by the bladder during urination. If left untreated, urinary infections can cause kidney damage and renal scarring with the loss of potential growth of the kidney and high blood pressure later in life

Anyway, God must have been watching out for me because shortly after this diagnoses while I was visiting my sisters church, a friend spoke up and mentioned that her cousin's daughter (Annie) also has this! I was so excited to know I had a friend, one who DOES know what I'm feeling and what I'm about to face. Someone I could talk too.

Annie is 9 mos old and has had VUR all her life. She has 2 ureters on the side that is messed up- one ureter has the reflux and the other doesn't. She's been on the antibiotics route for sometime, with no real success. However they were scheduled for reconstructive surgery as of Oct 8th. The idea is that they can go in a much smaller incision, take the bad ureter and implant it into the good ureter and all is right int he world again! I haven't talked with Natalie, Annie's mom, yet to find out how things went but I know God was watching over their family and will continue to do so day, after day. :)

Please pray for Ben and Natalie Colby and baby Annie!

McCain or Obama

2008-10-16T11:13:00.000-07:00

Has anyone made up their mind yet, or is it just me who is completely lost?

Following the debates is very difficult for me. Seems like they talk in circles, never really answering any actual questions and never providing a solution to the already existing problem. Seems like they just want more money, to raise taxes and decrease benefits... keep the rich, rich and the poor, poor.

I like things about each candidate, but I couldn't tell you one thing about either side! How does that work!?!? Maybe what I should really do is make a Pros vs. Cons list for each one. But have you been to their websites? They aren't clean cut sites. There again, everything is in circles and who knows what they plan to cut out once elected! I mean really, you don't think they will be able to pull off everything they claim -right?!?! Ugg.

It would be nice to find a neutral site that would outline what each candidate stands for, what they hope to accomplish or do away with... Can anyone offer a good site to go to?

Decision 2008!

2008-10-16T10:55:00.000-07:00

My mom has made a decision! I know, it's exciting!! She's decided to move back to Wisconsin -temporarily that is.

My family has a dairy farm back home and my Uncle Mike wants to get out of the business. He has decided to try Truck Driving and will be attending school in Nov-Dec. and has asked mom if she would come back to help around the farm while he is gone, paying her of course. My only problem with this is this is where Donnie (the boyfriend) happens to also be. He seems like a nice guy; very caring, very helpful (at times) and is willing to put up with my mom... But, as mom has pointed out before, too many times he’s said he would do something and not follow through, he’s a bit of a hoarder when it comes to reading material –which drives mom crazy and the fight –a lot. And while it may feel good to return to someplace you are comfortable with, it may not always be the best place for you and I only hope she realizes this before it’s too late.

So the important thing to remember here is… She is all grown up and is capable of making grown up decisions –on her own. I am not her mother, though it may feel like it at times. She is capable of doing this! :)

And on the sixth...

2008-10-16T10:50:00.001-07:00

So, here's the deal:
Open your pictures folder
Go to the SIXTH folder
Go to the SIXTH picturePublish it to a NEW POST and tell the story of the photo.

Here's my post. This is Sophie just after eating dinner of some sort. She must have really enjoyed herself! She is coming at me with a washer cloth to clean 'my' face. What a sweetie.

Turns out, she was the weakest link

2008-10-14T10:33:00.000-07:00

As most of you know, my mom moved down here about 3 months ago. She was living in Wisconsin (Home for us) with her boyfriend and things weren't moving along as she had hoped, so she decided it was time for a change -which is something my mom is good at doing! She's been at my house since and hasn't really been looking for a job -I suppose in hopes that this drastic move would have been the push her bf needed, kind of like a slap in the face in a really scary movie like you see.

I should stop here and clarify -when I say 'move forward' I don't mean to marriage, I mean move forward in getting a truck driving job together. I don't fully understand the whole story just that they never planed to get married, only to peruse a life together. Mom has always, from what my sister tells me at least, wanted to be a truck driver. Her bf is currently a TD and they had a plan to drive over the road as a team. So she took a course and has had her license for quite some time now. Meanwhile, he was supposed to be looking for a job for them together... Needless to say, that didn't happen and here she is!

Something happened about 2 weeks ago and she started looking for a job. Today she had a 4 day job interview with SWFT. I know, 4 days! Today was day 1 and they were supposed to be going over the basics. She was soooo nervous about the driving portion of the test because she hasn’t had a chance really to put her new found knowledge to use yet and I would imagine it’s not like riding a bike -you do forget! Anyway, she passed the driving portion just fine but failed to be able to push 100 lbs and since she couldn't push 100 lbs, they’ve sent her home. Turns out, she was the weakest link! Like I told her, at least now we know what needs to be worked on… Instead of pulling Sophie around in the laundry basket at night, she needs to be pushing her! :)

The day after...

2008-10-14T06:19:00.001-07:00

As you know, the last couple of days I've been helping my boss clean out his house --Today, I feel like a train ran over my body, backed-up and drove off again! My legs, my arms, my chest, even my hair all hurt -in some form or fashion! Though, this could just be a side affect from the Flu shot I received over the weekend too. Ugg.

Pray I make it to the store for some good ol' Thera-Flu (with Lemon)!

On a happier note, Mom left last night for her 4 day Job Interview. Yeay. She was a bit nervous last night, but I think she will do great and they will offer her a job. That will definitely lift her spirits.

Ok, so I might have...

2008-10-10T06:12:00.001-07:00

Ok, so I might have lied a little when I said "don't get your hopes up for my Blog"... Turns out I really kind of enjoy this non-communicative talking! Moreover, endless ramblings of one's own thoughts! :)

So yesterday, and today, I have been helping my boss' wife un-clutter their home. Actually, I really don't mind it all that much. It gets me out of the office, with a little exercise on the side! Today, my mom will be joining us for the fun. Their house is about 5200 sq ft and with 4 (mostly) grown children, 2 dogs and a fish... they have a lot of stuff to un-clutter. OMG, a lot of stuff!

They are avid readers; so far we have been able to donate about 2 boxes, have collected about 3 boxes for Half-Price Books and have packed away another 2 or 3 boxes to be kept. Please don't get me wrong -when I say they are avid readers, I mean -after all this packing, they still have another 3-5 very full built-in book cases!! Yikes!

Today, I think we will be mostly cleaning and throwing things away. But One man's trash, is another man's treasures and I'm sure I will find lots of things to be donated! So far I have 3 very full bags to be donated! Yea for World Relief!

Happy shopping for all!

Today!

2008-10-09T06:12:00.000-07:00

Today! The word "today" is more then just a word really; its a conversation starter, its an entry way into someone life, its a beginning -or an end I suppose... but for me, Today! is a beginning. Today I want to live like never before; Today I have lots of energy and I want to jump on the couch; Today I feel like loving the world; Today I feel more blessed then any other Today... Today! What a great word anda great way to feel. Now, if I could only figure out how to feel this way every day. :)

I hope your Today! is just as great as mine.

First blog

2008-10-07T09:06:00.000-07:00

Hello blogging world!! This would be my first official blog! Yeah. Though, don't get your hopes up as I don't know how much blogging I plan to do... It's not that I'm busy at the office or that I don't enjoy talking about my life -it's just something new to get into the habit of doing and let's face it, if I was good at new habits I would have ... (fill in the blanks) by now! :)

So, I suppose since this is my first blog I should probably chat a little about myself... So here goes: I am a new found Christian -that is, I was found in 2006! I have a great circle of friends, both new and old, I belong to a wonderful church and my family is very accepting and understanding of my new choices.

I hope to continue down my new pathway of life, not only to further my knowledge of Jesus but to raise my family with my new beliefs and appreciations of same.